Here’s how I start a Matrix:

Standing in front of a whiteboard, chalkboard, etc., I say something like, “I like to start by knowing who’s important to folks. People like family, friends, and such. Who is important to you?”

I quickly draw the vertical and horizontal lines of the Matrix and start writing the responses in the lower, right quadrant. Whatever is said, I write it. So if someone says, “Me, that’s who’s important to me” I would write ‘me.’ If someone said, “My dog.” Then I would write ‘dog.’

Why write almost anything someone in a group says?

  1. Because I’m getting a conversation about values started, not finished. 
  2. The basic stance of doing the matrix (and ACT in general) is “Yes, and…”
  3. Those familiar with improvisation know that “yes, and…” is the secret. To say “no” stops the routine. I almost never say “no,” I want to keep the routine flowing.
Those familiar with ACT will see this as “values” work, and it is. Some have asked me, “Why do you start with values?” My answer is because that’s where the most juice is; ultimately what motivates us is doing for others. This establishes that “target” first thing.
Next time we will move to the lower, left quadrant.
Be Well,
Kevin